I have recently embarked on a new photography project at uni revolving around the idea of dreams, the subconscious, the Ego, the Super Ego and the Id.
I constructed a small questionnaire/survey to see if I could get some personal input and thoughts from others. It’s all anonymous as well :) So it would be really appreciated if people could spare 5 minutes of their time to answer the survey and help me out!
Many thanks! :)
Some people view eating disorders as common and overrated, but it is difficult to understand the suffering and damage it causes to one’s self-image if it is not experienced personally.
I have always been a bit overweight, or ‘chubby’, ever since I was born.
Low self-esteem can result from many things - bullying etc, but it seems that family influence plays a very important role in self-image and eating disorders as well, particularly in women - mothers and daughters.
Ever since I can remember, my mother has been very slim, but not naturally. The amount of times I remember having a meal with the family whilst she just ate a plain salad is uncountable. The amount of times we’d be walking in the street, and if there was an overweight/obese person walking by, my mother would whisper spiteful words to my sister and I and criticise how awful and disgusting they look.
It seems that this attitude wears off onto the children, where the media portrays only ‘thin’ as beautiful. This idea of being overweight turns into a deadly sin - some grotesque disfigurement that should be looked down upon and seen as ‘revolting’.
Ever since I was a child, my mother and grandmother would chuckle at how I was a bit chubby, and ‘kindly’ suggest wearing control pants, or losing weight.
Nag nag nag, nag nag nag.
When you see how delighted your mother is to be the ‘thinnest’ in the family, weighing only x kgs and bragging about it, it sends your self-esteem spiraling down an endless hole of hatred for yourself.
You are not pretty, because you are not thin. You are not attractive, because your mother believes that being thin is attractive. You are overweight and thus, unhappy. You are not happy, because your mother associates being thin with being happy.
I have battled with bulimia and binge-eating since adolescence. The list of pills and diets I have been on is endless, and I have never learnt to accept my body for what it is.
It angers me that people can be so judgmental and spiteful, even if they are family.
“Never judge a book by its cover”, they said… Hypocrites.